Friday, July 23, 2010

Tres Rubios y los gemelos (gotta love Google Translate)

So far since moving in Lance has been all talk. He looks like a playa, he talks like a playa, but he never really brings in the ladies like a playa. Aaron on the other hand is quite capable at bringing around girls. He has this fearlessness about him which somehow allows him to just walk up to strange women and invite them over.

Calvin does a lot of solo type of work where he brings over a girl, dates her, breaks her heart, and occasionally the house can benefit from his seconds. Gabe does the solo thing too, except he hides them from us. I almost never say a word to one of Gabe's girls. If he's with one, he doesn't hang out with us.

Nick never brings anyone over and neither does Tim or Peter.

I am pretty capable when it comes to introducing new women to our pad. Probably only bested by Aaron. I have excellent networking and retention skills that give our house the ability to milk every possible angle from a girl, her friends, co-workers, cousins, sisters, mom... okay not mom... not yet.

Recently there have been two groups of females who have created some excitement among the lads of the pad. The first came surprisingly as a result of Lance and the internet. I call them The Three Blonds. Kelly, Karen, and Farrah. They are all cute and all very blond. Lance met Kelly on Facebook and invited her over and she just brought the other two with her.

The first night a group of girls comes over we try to ensure that no other groups are going to be there. This way they can receive the full attention of our house and not be scared off by our usual harem. This allows us to determine quite subtly how we are going to pair off. We can see who likes them and try and guess who they like.

The Three Blond's arrived and I instantly picked Karen as my favorite by looks. Then within the first hour or so I started to lean towards liking Farrah. Farrah was spunky and fiery. She was the obvious leader and I found that attractive. Plus she was all about school and getting a masters and stuff which I also find attractive. It was apparent though that she was the favorite of a few of the other guys and it seemed like she was getting into Lance.

I really feel like I may have had a chance at working on Farrah that night. I rarely felt threatened in competition with my roommates except for with Calvin but he wasn't there. Unfortunately, a second group of new girls just decided to stop by that night.

These girls came as a result of my effort... so the task to entertain them was left to me. We never let new girls co-mingle until we know them better because we know what a tendency they have to be catty with each other, especially in fertile grounds like our house.

We call these girls The Twins because, well... two of them are twins. Dana and Donna are identical twin sisters. They are both cute, too. We just call them the twins because the other girls who hang out with them are of little interest to any of the guys and therefore are just referred to under the umbrella of the term The Twins. They have a sidekick, Carol, who isn't really cute but is pretty good for a conversation. Today, the twins also brought along their step sister who I had only met once before.

We went into the living room and talked while the other three guys who were home stayed and fought over The Three Blonds. I had met them at my little brothers mission farewell. That was a couple months ago, and I had been nurturing the contact to get them over here and it was just now starting to work out.

We talked and flirted. Aaron masterfully came in and out of both rooms throughout the night. Me and The Twins ended up playing Mario Kart which was fun, but in the few quiet moments I would hear the Three Blonds laugh in unison and wish I was in there with them.

After a couple hours The Twins left. I felt I made some good headway with getting them to come back.

When I returned to the room The Three Blonds were hanging in they were all watching Hot Rod. During the "Huwhy ham hi saying huwhisky huwhat huway?" scene I watched the pairings. Lance was in the little loveseat with Farrah, he was tickling her arm. Nick and Kelly were sitting awkwardly on the sofa not touching but close enough that it was clear they wanted to. Gabe sat behind Karen and was rubbing her neck.

I stood for a few moments thinking I had missed my chance and was about to leave when Gabe got a phone call. He left the room to answer it and I thought, "I should take his spot." My thought was interrupted by a huge pit in my stomach. Then Karen said, "Jake. I need someone to sit behind me." I tried to be funny and looked around and pointed at myself and then whispered "Me?" She laughed and said "Get over here."

The girls left right after the movie. Lance got a text from Farrah saying that Karen was creeped out by Gabe and interested in me. Not sure where Nick and Kelly stand but it looks like at least Lance and I had a successful pairing after all.


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