Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Help Me Susan

We did two double dates last weekend and I went out with this girl my Aunt set me up with, and a girl who coaches my little sisters softball team. Neither were cute, one was funny, and I know that's so superficial, but seriously you have to be attracted to someone! You know?

With Calvin having Mindy and me going out with so-so's, I have been focusing most of my energy during the days on getting to know Andrea. She is so adorable. She isn't really dating anyone either. She has the most perfect mouth I have ever seen. If I got to kiss it I think it would be comparable to Joe Smith finding the Golden Plates!

I can't talk to her though. Every conversation we have involves several other people. She laughs at my jokes but then when just the two of us are together, I can't even muster a good conversation. It's pretty frustrating. So, I decided today to confide my crush with my Manager Susan. Susan is 30 and probably one of the heaviest women I have ever known, but she is awesome, and loves me. She is a strong woman from the south and even though she made fun of me a bit, she agreed to help me win over Andrea's affection.

If only I can figure out how... and no Calvin, I don't need to hear how I just need to man up and ask her out. I am telling you and the readers that this chick is so far out of my league I would get shot down like a clay pigeon.

Jake

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'm a shooter and sometimes... Clay pigeons are hard to shoot down. They fly pretty quickly. You've got to aim and fire at just the right time. :D