Sunday, June 7, 2009

Singles Ward

We went to our ward for the first time today. Not good, my friends. Not good. There's a guy in the ward who looks like an ugly(er) version of John Cusack. The funny part is, his name is John and his last name sounds like Cusack a little, but I can't remember what it is. There are a few Sunday School classes and Jake, Bryson and I went into the Dating and Eternal Marriage class. We're all kinda new to the whole singles ward thing, but I swear there should be more attractive girls in there. It's not like there were even KIND OF cute girls. They were all pretty gross.

The lesson today was about how to talk through disagreements with your spouse and how to communicate more effectively, in general. I whispered to Jake that it didn't really matter that much anyway, since we're gonna have dozens of wives in the Celestial Kingdom to fall back on. He started laughing and dared me to say it. I, of course, told him "no" cause we're new in the ward. Then he reminded me that the class was full of uglies and that I shouldn't care about pissing them off. I still said "no", but then he promised to fake cry the next time he bared his testimony in sacrament meeting if I said it. I always think it's funny when he does that, so I raised my hand and told the class that having a plethora of wives in the next life will be healthy for everyone's relationship throughout the eternities. A few of the guys in the class laughed, but most of them seemed pissed that I was funny and glared at me like I was new competition for all those mustached, eyes-too-far-apart, pleasantly plump, sweet spirits. Uh... you can have them, bro. They're all yours.

Bryson says there's a University Ward close by that we, technically, can't go to cause we're not students, but I think we're gonna try it out anyway.

One last thing. I've really been digging on Mindy. I see her a few times a week and she's pretty cool. She's a little more out-doorsy than I'm used to, but she's pretty freakin' hot. It's kinda weird cause Bryson has been seeing his new girlfriend almost everyday and Jake and I make fun of him, but if I could have it my way... I'd see Mindy everyday, as well.

Anyway. This post is long enough.

Calvin

3 comments:

Bekah said...

oh.my.gosh

i'm in love with you. if i wasn't already married & had any interest at all in being Mormon, I'd be in love with you.

oh wait I already said I'm in love with you.

I'm torn, I really am torn Mormon Bachelor pad guys.. Am I in love? Or will I be in love? Time will tell... keep bringing the funny.. I'll keep you updating on how much love levels are for you...

Becca said...

As a single Mormon woman myself, I TOTALLY think you're an ass if this is real life. But thus far, I'm convinced this blog is for show. And I enjoy it. You'd better believe this blog will be in my Google reader.

Whitney said...

haha, oh the joys of singles ward. Can you please tell me where I can find boys like you two to liven up Sunday school class a bit. Its scary... im telling you.