Brittany's roommate watched her kids last night so Brittany could come over for our FHE Game Night hosted by the MBP (covertly, of course). There were probably 50 people at our house, by far the best turnout we've ever had for an FHE.
I was doing my best to mingle and make everyone feel welcome at our house, but was also trying my best to make sure Brittany was comfortable and didn't feel too out of place, since it was her first real experience at our house and out of her comfort zone. Jake helped me out quite a bit. Almost too much, really. Jake has never been one to cock-block, but he did admit to me later than he thought Brittany was smokin' hot. It's pretty obvious that he's more attracted to her than I am... even though he IS dating Andrea.
Anyway, there was this other guy there, as well. We call him Spud cause his head is shaped like a potato, but he calls himself "Z" and he wears a really gay gold necklace with a "Z" dangling from it. This dude is about 5' 4" and thinks he's the bomb. He's always trying to get people to "fist bump" him, but he calls it "give me some rock". I watched him try to get Jake to give him some rock, last night and Jake said, "No dude. I don't give 'rock'." Spud then kind of whispered, "Then hook me up with some scizz" and he held out his two fingers like he was playing "Rock, Paper, Scissors". Jake laughed and said, "What's 'scizz'?" Spud brought up his other hand with some finger scissors and started using both pair of scissors to cut up the other one in a subtly sexual way. It was pretty funny.
About two hours into the evening, Brittany came up to me and said that Spud had been trying to talk to her all night and wouldn't leave her alone. Then, Brittany alleged, Spud walked past her and touched her butt. Then she looked at me like I was supposed to do something about it.
Honestly, there's no way Spud grabbed her butt intentionally. He's a d-bag, but not like that. And Brittany didn't say "grab" or "squeeze" or "fondle" or "tussle". She said "touch", which could easily mean "graze" or "skim" or "brush up against". But she still stared at me.
I'm not a confrontational person. This is obvious by my "girlfriend breakup" stories. They don't exist. I don't break up with girls. I just stop calling them and don't answer my phone when they call me. It takes a bit longer to be officially "broken up", but it happens eventually.
I didn't want to minimize her molestation claim, but I also didn't want to seem like a jealous, violent, melodramatic over-reactor. So I asked her, "What do you want me to do?" Brittany's eyes got kind of wide, like she couldn't believe my knuckles weren't already bloody. "You don't have to do anything. I'm just gonna go. I feel weird." That's when I really felt like an idiot. I told her she shouldn't have to leave because of one guy. It was my house and I'd ask him to leave if she didn't want to be around him. Her helpless sigh told me that it seemed to be an acceptable reaction.
So I found Spud and told him that Brittany was with me. He apologized and said he didn't realize it. Then I told him that he was making Brittany feel uncomfortable and that it would be best if he left. He apologized again and walked out the door. No debate. No argument. Nothing. He just left.
I really don't think the "touch" was intentional, but Brittany was happy and I felt pretty good at having marked my territory... even if it was with the only guy at our house I might have actually been able to beat up.
Note to self: Avoid venturing into public with Brittany unless the desire to participate in fisticuffs is present.