Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Incorrigible

Quick Sanders update: ... ... ... nothing much to report. Some half-hearted phone conversations. A couple of random texts like,

Jake: How was tanning then?
Sanders: Tan isn't a color Jake... it's a lifestyle.

and

Jake: Interested in Jazz tickets Wednesday, well, one ticket? As I will be using the other.
Sanders: Interested? Sort of. Capable? No, I have lab the morning after.

and

Sanders: I'm kind of wondering, um if, uh, like you weren't doing anything... if you wanted, you know, maybe to go to a movie? I mean if your not busy?
Jake: Um did you get cerebral palsy since I last saw you?
Sanders: Jake!!! That is so rude. Ha ha ha. I laughed but only because you're ignorant. Cerebral palsy doesn't make people stutter.
Jake: So you were stuttering then? (squinty eyes)
Sanders: I was playing all "cute and shy".
Jake: Yeah, being that that is exactly opposite of your normal personality, I thought something had changed - hence the cerebral palsy comment.
(hour passes with no response)
Jake: Hello
(another hour passes)
Jake: Okay, sorry for misusing cerebral palsy. You are cute. Promise.
Sanders: Ha ha ha, I'm going to pretend that I wasn't texting you to teach you a lesson.
Jake: Well, fine but while you were ignoring me I got on google and learned a few lessons of my own.
Sanders: Do tell.
Jake: Well, I learned that Sylvester Stallone actually wrote and starred in an Oscar winning movie. and...
Sanders: Are you really that young that you didn't know that?
Jake: Hey, we're talking about the guy in Get Carter and Rambo 3 for heaven sake. Oscar-anything should be a surprise.
Sanders: Ha ha! Ok, and what else did we learn lil Jakers.
Jake: I learned that earlier today when I asked if you had cerebral palsy, what I meant was Parkinson's.
Sanders: You are horrible.
Sanders: Do you know what incorrigible means?
Jake: Nope, and that's not going to change.
Sanders: See that was funny. Making fun of others -not so much.
Jake: I'm unclear what you're talking about.
Sanders: Oh Jake, you are surprisingly adorkable, but I'm ending this conversation before you start mocking any other group of people ;) Besides I have class.
Jake: ta-ra cutie pie.

So, we haven't seen each other for almost two weeks. We don't have any plans to see each other either. At this point we both seem to be on an unspoken schedule. One where we make sure that if we haven't heard from each other for two days we make some sort of contact. Valentine's Day is this week, and well, I think we are both doing a bang up job avoiding it.

It's over with Sanders. I'm just lucky that appears mutual. Perhaps, we can remain friends after this... though that's never happened to me before so I treat the idea like baby pigeons.

Jake

44 comments:

Zona Bosted said...

By pigeons do you mean baby rats with wings?? Poor Jake. I have a sister I would love to set you up with but alas....She is dating a guy much taller then you.

Autumn said...

I might actually be the first to comment? If not, oh well. Since Calvin claims I'll go back and forth on if I like you guys or not, I'll prove him right.

Good post Jake. It's good to see you attempt to still talk to her. Good boy.

Arianna N. McMillan said...

AM I REALLY FIRST TO COMMENT?! now i need to read the post..lol

Bethany said...

Now I have to google Baby Pigeons. Since when does this blog hand out homework?

Anonymous said...

Well done mate. You escaped that one nicely. Now just watch out, being alone on Valentines Day can send some girls haywire......

singlemormonchick said...

be careful of the friends thing. it can so bite you in the ass. try going 3 days without contact and see what happens. maybe she is trying to let you go easy. a girl doesnt get over being told she is loved only to have it retracted a few days later. she might be planning revenge. lots of different possibilities to consider. for her, i bet being "friends" isnt one of them.

Julie said...

I am sure there are several comments waiting to be approved that are begging you to change the color of Sanders text...it is really difficult to read.

I am impressed with how you completely avoided her question about going to a movie.

ginger said...

I say good riddance

Alexis Mullino said...

Your google comment was HILARIOUS! Hhaa :)

Crystal said...

I think that conversation was very cute and friendly.

Maybe you are right. Maybe you can be friends.

I doubt it though. But I think you'll live.

The Lady Girl said...

Yeah, I'm wondering about the baby pigeons, and how do you treat baby pigeons as opposed to adult pigeons? are you not supposed to run after baby pigeons? Nevermind.

Rissy said...

I like Sanders even more after reading this.
She's a very funny girl!
Thanks for the short-but sweet-but funny post.

Brittney said...

Baby pigeons people! It's a common analogy...

Have you ever seen a baby pigeon?

No?

Well they obviously exist, but most people never see them.

Get it? Jake knows that people are capable of being friends with their ex's, he's just never seen/experienced it.

Bonnie said...

hmmm.... I think you should try harder. I think you keep letting go amazing possibles..

Bonnie said...

I've never heard that baby pidgeon thing either, weird!

trust me said...

baby pigeons are the ugliest thing on the planet.

Anonymous said...

Didn't she ask you to see a movie? Did you completely ignore her? I think she was trying to get together with you and when you were an ignorant jerk and ignored her and made fun of people instead, she probably decided she didn't want to go out with you anyways.

Alexandra said...

Baby pigeons?

brie said...

tanning isn't a color, but a lifestyle?

VOMIT.

Sara said...

I found an injured baby pigeon once in the 125th street subway station in Manhattan. I took it home with me and searched online for how to take care of it. I then bought dog food, blended it with water to mash it up, and fed the pigeon through a tube every two hours throughout the night until I could safely drop it off at a refuge.

If you do this with Sanders, please send pictures.

B R I T N E Y said...

Sure tan is a lifestyle... A lifestyle of skin cancer maybe...

Eh, Valentine's day isn't that big of a deal anyway... both of you will manage just fine without doing anything fancy with candle-lit dinners and such...

Heather Lee said...

Is Sanders one of those girls who tans all the time? Is she orange? Because I like her less then...

If it's over with Sanders, why don't you just end it officially? Obviously it's mutual. Dragging it on will just make thing even more awkward.

And I've also never heard the baby pigeons thing.

Tiffany said...

Your texts with Sanders make me happy. They are adorable and fun. I enjoy eves dropping on your texting.

Tara said...

"Tan isn't a color Jake... It's a lifestyle."

ha ha ha ha, she's quoting Stuey from Family Guy. That episode when he is tanning all the time and thinks he's gonna have cancer. Which makes Sanders more awesome than ever.

Too bad sarcasm isn't transfered through text. I'm sure you got it, Jake, but your readers don't.

Careful Jake, this girl seems like a keeper to me.

Kristin Lee said...

I like Sanders and I like you, I think you guys look like you have fun together. So it kind of sucks that you're pushing her away. But I don't know how normal LDS relationships work, it seems like commitment comes out very soon in them and that would scare me away too.

Elizabeth Downie said...

This post was kind of refreshing after the last one! I wasn't sure what I thought of Sanders before, but she sounds pretty cool in this post.

ChristineMarie said...

The incorrigible bit was fantastic.

Tripp Hazard said...

I like the friendly banter. Sanders just went up a few points in my book. If you don't want to date her, maybe you should pass her on to me. Is she cute? Any girl that can quote family guy gets one bonus point. So even if she is a 6, with that bonus point, she is a 7. If she can speak with an English or Australian accent, that would bump her to an 8.

The Lady Girl said...

ha ha, i like Sara's pigeon story. It made me laugh. Yes if you end up feeding Sanders blended dog food through an eye dropper, please take pictures... whoops drool just fell from my mouth, I hope no one saw that.

annettechapman said...

I thought that when Jake said "treating the idea like baby pigeons" he meant he is being careful with the idea. But now I don't know, haha.

Jakey poo, I think Sanders really cares about you. But, (as much as it contradicts my last sentence) she is smart. She is backing off to give you the space to pursue her. That is the only way she can know how you really feel about her after all that has happen. (Actions trump words, right?)

I think there is a lot more to her then you may realize. Her sarcasm reveals that you really have hurt her. That is a usual chink in a "cool" girls armor.

I think her and I are about the same age. Dating younger men can be complicated: Are they being immature or is this JUST the way they are?

I don't think she pushed for the DTR bc she knows that if a guy really wants you, he will pursue. But this can backfire....I think it messed with her confidence after the faux engagment and escalated into the awkward situation at Calvin's parents house.

Do you really want to let her go??

Anonymous said...

She's just not that into you. Shocker, I know.

Trish said...

it looks like it's mutual haha. Or maybe she's still interested, but doesn't want to pursue too much in fear of getting hurt. It sounds like she's still flirting with you though haha. Friends is definitely possible. I don't like it when a good friendly relationship ends (when they find out I'm waiting for a missionary) because guys start to act all awkward around. geeeez friends is still okay right?

anyway good luck! :)

Waiting On a Missionary said...

ok, on to the next one.

-lace

Hailee said...

People eat baby pigeons. Before they can fly they're called squabs and they're...a delicacy? or something?

Amy said...

Awww, baby pigeons... I love it when you guys end a post with something off the wall that makes me forget what the post was even about. :D

P.S. I caution my husband not to make fun of the handicapped or he is going to end up like that or have a child like that. But I can never say it with a straight face because he looks so dang funny doing it!

P.P.S. Even if you two are over, you are both freakin' hilar.

Christi said...

This post made me sad. I think everyone has been in a relationship where you get along great, and on paper everything adds up. But for some reason, it's just not there.

Marci Darling said...

Baby pidgeons.....

tifsong said...

you should treat baby pigeons better.

Jade said...

Oh Jake, I'm bummed that you and Sanders are done, I really liked her alot, and from how things were going before seemed like you guys had potential. But I agree with all that Annette said earlier, she's just keeping things cool and not pushing things to see if your really just gonna let go and lose her even though she still wants you, or are you gonna man up and go get her?

I say you should go get her! But just take things slower so you don't get freaked out with it.

Nikki said...

The more readers you guys get, the worse your comments ARE! SIGH. Girls are RE-TARD-ED. I admit it. Especially Mormon girls, effing shut-up already. I can't stand the comments anymore!! I can no longer read the comments without wanting to drop about 10 f-bombs and ram a fork in my eye all while driving MY CAR INTO A GOSH DAMN TREE. Good luck with the mutated single Mormon female population. They suck ass. I'd go non-member in a heart beat with these anal retentive bitches to choose from. Whew, I feel better. Carry on.

Lady Libertine said...

so...um...do you guys like ditzy girls?

Virgilicious said...

okay, so I am at work and I stumbled accross ya'lls blog on a friend's blog. I've been reading it for like an hour! haha. ya'll are very entertaining and interesting to read about. keep em comin.

Joie said...

So you don't like her anymore? You're just willing to give up on it all because you're lame and keep comparing her to Andrea?

How does she make you feel when you're with her? Isn't that more important than the little detail of you telling her you loved her even though you weren't sure. I think you're giving up on a good thing because you're just not mature enough to recognize what you have.

Laurel said...

I spent the past couple of days doing nothing but reading all of your guys' posts from the begining. If my school work fails from this, I blame you guys! But, Jazz tickets huh? I'd be interested any time! I'd even be down with a little horizontal action.. maybe.