Friday, January 1, 2010

2010 Looks to be a Doozy for the Jakester

New Years Eve was pretty awesome. When I say awesome I am particularly focusing on the “awe” portion of the word. All of us went to a little party up in Bountiful (minus Lance he went to Harry-O’s black tie masquerade thingy). Oh, and here’s a story you’ll love, we were invited to said party by none other than Tori.

Yep, Tori is going to be flying to BYU-Hawaii next week. She called Calvin and told him that she had a friend that she really thought Nick would like. Rather than setting her friend Jennifer and Nick up on a date she wanted Nick, and all of us to come to her friend’s party where Nick and Jennifer could meet.

Tori’s proposition seemed innocent enough… HA! riiiiiiggght. I told Calvin that this was clearly a ploy to get attention from him. He was aware but undaunted. I think he figured with Marie out of town, it’s New Years Eve, and he has to kiss someone. Tori is a given, (and though our blog makes us sometimes come off as suave lady killers with the ability to walk into an room at any time and score with the 'finest of fine' ladies) Calvin, like any man when action is concerned, is often prone to take the “given” rather than seeking a better option and risk getting nothing.

Aaron and Nick thought theirs was as good a party to go to as any. Nick hadn’t gotten any action for a couple months either, so I think he was liking the "hook up" idea. I brought Sanders along for the festivities and the night was really fun and a little insane.

The party was rather small (about 20 people) but we all got some stroke-of-midnight-smooches. Here’s a little shock-and-awe for you… Aaron ended up making out with Tori in front of everybody, thanks to a conniving scheme Calvin and I came up with off the cuff. Nick, got some! Hooray! I got some... and while kissing Lisa, I would occasionally look up to see Calvin, lip-locked with a different girl every couple minutes… including one girl, which, I’m pretty sure is married.

I would expound, but I have far more important things to talk about than our escapades in the early minutes of 2010. Now on to me. Three somewhat paramount things have come up in my life in the past three days.

Thing One: I lost my job. That’s right, I got fired. Not laid-off, fired. Perhaps I should point out that I have been fired or laid off from every job I have ever had... except for one. And, actually I was only laid off once and that was my job before this one. I probably deserved to get fired. In probably 80% of my life's firings, I deserved it.

Why am I such a terrible employee? Well, I have a problem with authority. I do not respect authority. I generally think I am smarter than my superiors, thus I begin outsmarting them (or trying to) A practice which usually manifests itself in me doing the least amount of work I can in order to get the most amount of money.

This time I was fired because I was always late. Not by, like, five minutes, but more like 15 minutes to an hour. Every day. There was no outsmarting involved, though. I just never thought he’d fire me. I blatantly showed up late, usually with a grinning “sorry boss.” Well, when I showed up 63 minutes late for work on Tuesday and my excuse was “Um, I was up till 4am playing Modern Warfare 2”, he carried out his repeated warning and fired me.

Thing Two: I got kicked out of school. I know what you’re thinking, “How does someone get kicked out of college?” Well, I wasn’t a very good student in high school. Don’t mistake that for me not being a very good learner, I am just a bad student. I graduated high school with a 1.8 GPA. Yes, you most certainly can get a diploma with a GPA that low. I also, ignored my high school counselor’s advice and failed to take many of the required high school courses like senior year English, a higher math than geometry, foreign language, and science. I know, I know, my poor mother.

So, how did I make it into the U of U in the first place? Easy. I scored very, very high on the ACT test. A high enough score that, after my mission, they let me in despite my obvious lack of commitment. The counselor at the U said, “You are obviously learning, you’re just no good at homework.” I haven’t felt so understood like I did when she said that. However, it was on a “conditional acceptance” where I would have to take all the courses I skipped in high school.

I didn’t take the college seriously, just like my boss, and took whatever classes I wanted. I sort of figured they wouldn’t let me register for them if it was a big deal. I was wrong. So, even though I got a 4.0 for the classes I did take, I got a letter this week saying that I was out.

(Sigh) Thing One and Thing Two should be freaking me out. I can blame no one for my plight except for myself. Yet, I’m not really that worried. I can get another $9 an hour job… and I’m pretty sure the only requirement for getting into SLCC or Weber State is the ability to fog a mirror. So no big, and for now I will use this as an excuse to take the semester off.

Thing Three: I think Sanders and I might be getting married. At the party we went to last night, there was a room above the detached garage that is a make shift theater room. After Smooch Fest 2010. We sneaked away and ended up in that room lying in the dark in the jumbo Luv Sac. We made out and talked which is my favorite thing. I like talking and I like making out, and with my virgin perspective, can think of few things that rival or best those moments. Lisa and I didn’t get engaged, per se, but, well, read the story and see what you think.

It was pretty late. About an hour had gone by since Sanders and I started loving in the Luv Sac. Our conversation stalls when I say, “Look how cool the snow looks in the moonlight.” The flakes were huge, and I’m not sure if it’s a full moon, but it’s a bright one. Lisa says, “Oh my gosh it’s so pretty.” We stare out the window and after a few minutes I say, “It’s kind of mesmerizing, like staring at a fire.” She didn’t respond. Her head was on my shoulder, so I couldn’t see her eyes. I decide she was probably asleep. I gently kissed her on the forehead to check. She didn't respond.

I looked back out the window and wondered how long we had been up there. It was probably 12:30 when we left the living room to find someplace we could be alone. I mused over the nights events and was a bit surprised that no one had texted me or had come looking for us. Maybe they were still playing games, maybe they were watching a movie, maybe they had paired off and found themselves in similar surroundings to mine. There were more girls than guys… I grinned thinking that Aaron or Calvin might be snuggling with girls of their own.

Just then my phone rang, loud enough to wake Lisa up. It was a text from Aaron, “We’re crashing here tonight. Cool?” I had taken a stand on sleeping together with Lisa thus far, but figured she was pretty much already asleep and texted him back, “cool.”

Lisa says, “These Luv Sacs are extremely comfy to snuggle in, but they’re not the best for a snog.” I laugh, and say, “Yeah, my elbows and hands were never very sturdy, every time I shifted my weight I fell over.” She kissed me on the cheek and said, “You adapted to the unsure terrain nicely.” I reply, “That’s what I do, I adapt… did you just use the word 'terrain' in the dark.” Lisa giggled a little, “I’m tired.” I roll slightly on to my side which made her head fall softly back off of my shoulder and into my crelbow, I slid my other hand, which was resting on her side, up her side and back, and gently grabbed the back of her head and kissed her. Then I say, “Go to sleep.” She ignored me and said, “That’s how come I know you will do great, because you are a good adapter.”

I respond, “What?” She says, “With your job. And school. I’m not worried, because I think you’ll do great.” I say, “I’m not worried either.” She says, “I know, that’s another great thing about you.” I say, “I should get you tired more often so you'll deliriously compliment me.” She kisses me on the cheek again, and says, “I think I love you.” Caught off guard I paused for a second. So she starts talking again. “I know you don’t feel as strongly about me as I do you, but I think you are an amazing guy and I love you.”

My mind is racing. I feel very strongly about Lisa. I feel as strongly about her as I did Andrea. I’m just not sure if it’s love. I don’t even think I know what love is. I want to know, but… do I want her to show me? I didn’t want to say “I love you, too” if I didn’t mean it. But if I don’t even know what it is then how can I not mean it? I decided that because my feelings for her are as strong as I have ever had for a girl, that until I had a feeling stronger or more powerful to replace it, that this must be love.

“I love you, too.” I say back. Her face lit up as much as I could tell in the dark. “Really?” she yelps, her voice excited and higher than usual. I responded quickly, “Yes.” Lisa was laying on her side, but with me right next to her, her arms were trapped between our bodies bent at the elbows and then flat in front of her chest so her fists were right below her chin. I felt her body start to shake, and couldn't figure out if she was trying to move or if she was just that excited.

Then, she shifts her weight so she can pull both her arms out from under her, and grabs me by the cheeks and kisses me. She doesn’t just kiss me, she pellets me with kisses all over my face and mouth. She stops and looks at me. She has the “seeing” advantage because the moonlight from the window behind her and is illuminating my face. I can see, though, that her eyes were bouncing back and forth between different parts of my face. Then she says, “When you think about 'us' and the future do you think about us... married?” I think about her question, “Yes.” I say. She says, “Me too.” Then repeats the 'kiss attack' move.

Lisa settles down and rests on my shoulder again. All her moving around made us sink further into the Luv Sac and smash together even more. So, she had nowhere for her arms to go but on my chest. She sighed, her voice has gone back to the quiet tired voice from before, “I will, for real, let you take that back if you want.” I thought about it. Sure I don’t know what love is… or maybe I do and just need to learn it. And, sure, I omitted that when she asked me. I do really always think about us being married, though. I had been praying fairly generally about “us”, nothing specific yet, because I’ve been thinking it’s too soon. Obviously, (and remember this... cause it’s rare) I was wrong.

I say, “No, I really think we’re getting married.” Lisa whispers, “Me too.” I say, “I mean… I haven’t fasted about it or anything… and there has been no proposal, but those seem like technicalities.” Lisa whispers, “Yeah.” I look out the window to see the snow has stopped. She says, “Me too.”

We both lay there, in the dark, for several minutes. Then I feel Lisa’s breathing get slower. I assume she is asleep like before. I kiss her on the forehead again and say, “Night.” My mind runs through what just happened. I think to myself, "I am going to marry Sanders." Then I hear her voice again, “We’re getting married.” I didn’t fall asleep for a long time.

I am anxiously waiting for more time to pass to see how this pseudo-engagement shakes out. Lucky for me I don’t have a job, nor am I a student. I’ll have lots of time to ponder my future.

Jake

72 comments:

Sam, The Nanti-SARRMM said...

Good luck dude. And go to SUU so you can be close to Sanders. They have the same acceptance standards of Weber state, don't they?

Allison said...

WHOOO!! Are we gonna have to change the name from "Mormon Bachelor Pad" to.. I dunno.. something else? ;D Congrats Jake, and Calvin too for making out with multiple girls. :D


HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Nikki said...

My recommendation would be to NOT get married and to fornicate. Seriously. Don't get married. With your job situation and schooling, either practice some self control or just have sex and get married in a couple of years. Knowing what I know now and looking back 18 years I would run from you like a hooker from a cop. Not that I don't think you'll eventually get your shit together, it just wouldn't be while trying to be married and producing those 12 kids you want. So if you can't wait for the sex, do it, but don't get married.
I know. I am going straight to hell.

Shelby Lou said...

YOU ARE GETTING MARRIED!!!!

Kellie said...

I must admit.. I'm slightly jealous. But in this 'why the hell doesn't my boyfriend do these things' kind of way.

Congrats... I'm pretty sure you're not going to be one of those people that jump into marriage without making sure it's the right thing. You seem a lot smarter than that. And bummer about the first two, but things will work out.

Alexandria said...

Jake, I was not a big fan of yours. You seemed arrogant and just a little rude. I officially like you now.

Sorry about school and the job! Congrats about Sanders. She is legit.

Happy New Years boys!

JessicaB said...

Yikes. You mormons really move quickly with these things don't you.

Are you sure you're in love? Because you KNOW when you're in love.

I don't mean to sound like an ass. I'm just a cynic. So congrats!! Glad you're happy.

Crystal said...

Um...I'm like in shock. And I dont use the word like unless I'm talking about "liking" something. So the fact that I just used it is pretty amazing.

Wow. Um...Congrats? I just dont know. I feel like you should be POSITIVE that you want to get married before you say it. Having been proposed to but someone who just thought it was what he was supposed to do and then backing out of it I can promise you...it will hurt her more than anything in the world if you back off now that you've said those things. In that same regard, take some time to think and let her know sooner rather than later if you've changed your mind or if you aren't certain that is what you want.

You didn't ask for advice but I just felt it needed to be said.

Sorry about the job and school. Maybe it's a blessing in disguise?

Jade said...

Jake sorry about school and your job. But Dude your gonna get married!!!! I'm so excited for you, congratulations!!!!!

Scott said...

Congrats on the pseudo-engagement!

I do have to echo part of Nikki's sentiments- you need to get your stuff together before you can be a good husband. The first half of your post was filled with a whole bunch of red flags that I would hope you realize you need to address.

But getting married (in the temple) to a good woman who is as committed to the relationship as him is the best thing to ever happen to a man. It will make you a better person (if you let it) than you can imagine.

Don't let bitter people tell you it is a mistake to get married so young. Marriage works when both parties are committed to making it work. It does not matter how old or young, just how much it means to the two of you.

Jessica Marie said...

Ouch. Sorry about school and your job...but I'm sure it just means there's something better for you to do out there. I guess you have to take the good with the bad.
I'm very happy for you. There's nothing better than reaching that moment where you realize you could be forever happy with the person sitting right next to you. I think that's mostly what love is - happiness. If Lisa makes you happy, and you make her happy, you have nothing to worry about. You'll make it work. I hope 2010 is a great year for you both!

Chess said...

Woohoohoo! Breathlessly anticipating the development and culmination of this new--what?--story? Maybe? How exciting! Congrats! :)

KatOfDiamonds said...

Woah that is a lot to take in on Jan 1st. And I am also not you.

You'll figure it out Jake.

Tay said...

Wowza!

Sounds like quite the week you've had. :) I hope your decisions make you happy - you're a pleasant sort of chap and quite the romantic. I'm also glad that Sanders is normal and kind.

Anonymous said...

If you've found a woman who is willing to marry you even after being fired and kicked out of school, run to the temple. NOW.

Ashley said...

I'm not sure what to say. I certainly couldn't marry a guy that didn't seem to have any sort of prospect for being able to take care of a family...so I guess Sanders sounds like the perfect girl for you. Good luck.

Anonymous said...

Thank goodness you don't have to be a "great student" or a "great employee" to be successful in life and in business. You are obviously intelligent and quite the entrepreneur. Best of luck with these big life decisions. And thanks for reminding me of my husband's and my courtship:)

Kate Weber said...

Aw! That's cute! Happy New Year!

Ru said...

Well, congrats! (That was the positive side of me.)

Here comes the cynical side ... I've got to agree with everyone who is cautioning you not to rush anything. If Sanders is the one for you, she'll still be the one for you after a long engagement in which you two (a) get to know each other better and (b) you get your crap together. I say this with all the kindness in the world, Jake ... being smart is not enough. Knowing that you have a problem with authority is not enough. You clearly lack discipline, which is the most important quality a person can have. If you are blessed to be this smart, you need to make the most of that and not just coast on the skill of being able to outwit people. It's extremely ungrateful to do anything else.

And one more thing ... obviously all of these comments should be taken with a grain of salt, especially since we're reading your [heavily edited] version of reality, but you really need to consider the fact that Sanders is letting her heart run away with her. She's already been divorced once, and she's looking at a brand new RM who just got kicked out of college for one of the silliest reasons imaginable and thinking, "This could work"??? She's romanticizing you. (Which isn't the worst thing ever, but a dangerous way to start out a relationship.)

Who knows, you two might be totally made for each other, but you both need to get to know each other a LOT better before getting actually engaged.

Love,

Yet Another Commenter Who Apparently Views Herself As Your Unofficial Big Sis

Ru said...

Well, congrats! (That was the positive side of me.)

Here comes the cynical side ... I've got to agree with everyone who is cautioning you not to rush anything. If Sanders is the one for you, she'll still be the one for you after a long engagement in which you two (a) get to know each other better and (b) you get your crap together. I say this with all the kindness in the world, Jake ... being smart is not enough. Knowing that you have a problem with authority is not enough. You clearly lack discipline, which is the most important quality a person can have. If you are blessed to be this smart, you need to make the most of that and not just coast on the skill of being able to outwit people. It's extremely ungrateful to do anything else.

And one more thing ... obviously all of these comments should be taken with a grain of salt, especially since we're reading your [heavily edited] version of reality, but you really need to consider the fact that Sanders is letting her heart run away with her. She's already been divorced once, and she's looking at a brand new RM who just got kicked out of college for one of the silliest reasons imaginable and thinking, "This could work"??? She's romanticizing you. (Which isn't the worst thing ever, but a dangerous way to start out a relationship.)

Who knows, you two might be totally made for each other, but you both need to get to know each other a LOT better before getting actually engaged.

Love,

Yet Another Commenter Who Apparently Views Herself As Your Unofficial Big Sis

caitlin said...

Dude, get a job and get back into school. Just because she's financially secure doesn't mean you shouldn't be...man up.

Julie said...

Umm...Wow, didn't see that coming. Congratulations. The school and job thing will work out. I hope you realize tho' that getting married means you have get to get serious about school or a job or possibly both.

As far as LOVE goes...it is a choice. You choose whom you will love. The feelings fade, change and shift. There will be days when you wake up and you have to make a conscious decision that you are going to love that person laying next to you. I have been married for quite awhile. I adore my husband...I love him but the love I have for him is very different than that romantic, butterfly in the stomach love. This love is warm, comfortable and makes me smile. Sure there are times I still get butterflies in stomach when I am with my husband...but the love that endures time is really the best.

Is it too soon? Who knows...
I was engaged to my husband before our first real date. No judgment here.

Does she know about MBP????? That's really what we all want to know.

Kristin Lee said...

I have to admit, I didn't expect to be reading that! Congrats though! Happy new year!

Ashley said...

AT first I was like man your 2010 is going to suuuck. But then your little engagment made me smile and I really hope it works out for you. I like Sanders. She's great for you.

But you do still need to get an education Jake even if it's going to just be you hanging out with your kids on the beach.

Haley said...

WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!!!

That is all I have to say. Go team go.

Anonymous said...

oh crap. you better know what you're doing, jake. and you better actually propose to her. you can't just throw around the m word without knowing for sure. try to figure it out as quickly as possible. she's going to be agonizing over it until she knows for sure. trust me; that's how we women roll.

Heather said...

I always had a feeling that you would marry Sanders. I just didn't think it would be so soon! I hope it all works out, because it sounds like you two could be amazing together.

As for the other two things, I agree with everyone else. You seriously need to get your crap together.

me said...

how are you going to afford a ring?

Jessica said...

Don't married until you have your crap together. It adds a lot of unnecessary stress to a new marriage. A lot of unnecessary arguing. I think, if you really love this girl, it's time to man up, do the homework, get the job and act like a man about it, and face your responsibilities. Heaven forbid you get married and she get s pregnant right away and you can't find a job or get into school... and you have a wife and baby to support.


Time to grow up! Trust me! No one likes homework of any kind but we all gotta do it kid

Jessica said...

Don't married until you have your crap together. It adds a lot of unnecessary stress to a new marriage. A lot of unnecessary arguing. I think, if you really love this girl, it's time to man up, do the homework, get the job and act like a man about it, and face your responsibilities. Heaven forbid you get married and she get s pregnant right away and you can't find a job or get into school... and you have a wife and baby to support.


Time to grow up! Trust me! No one likes homework of any kind but we all gotta do it kid

Desiree M. said...

yeah, does she know about mbp?its no good starting out with secrets like that.

Anonymous said...

No job, no education, no prospects, no motivation. Married at 22. That is pathetic.

Anonymous said...

Um, she is marrying up...

I thought you left Andrea because....oh whatever.

karlielsa said...

Seriously, you are rediculous. Why is everybody feeling sorry for you? It's your own fault you lost your job and got kicked out of school. If I might say so myself you sound like a loser. Sanders should know better also. She probably thinks you will get your crap together but you won't. Why would you change? You're going to be a stay at home dad right? Who needs an education? Who needs something to fall back on just incase Sanders job fails. You are in denial like I said before. And you said you don't know if you are in love. YOU KNOW! You say maybe you do, you just need to learn it. Frick, if somebody said they needed to "learn" how to love me, I would be out of there. I feel sorry for Sanders, maybe I don't. She has been divorced before so you think she would know what to look for. I would find somebody who values their life. You seem like you just don't care. Think of her for once and not yourself. Can you support her and a family or are you going to put all that stress on her. Get your crap together and think with your head and not your other head!

Kaitlyn said...

GO Jake! I'm super excited for you and Lisa!!! I haven't been this excited for you since Andrea was around!!

Alexandra said...

Dude, Sam, SUU has higher standards than Weber. No offense to Weber, but I'm a big fan of SUU (but not Cedar).
Anyway...

I hope things work out with you two, because I think Sanders is pretty awesome. You two seem to be good for each other, from your slightly biased stories.

Haylee Abney said...

So now that you and Sanders are getting hitched, will you reveal yourself?! or at least put a picture up?! Because you won't really be a batchelor anymore!:)

How I Really Feel said...

I am actually sick to my stomach. No wonder everyone in Utah takes Xanax... You marry each other after 30 seconds and spend the rest of your lives escaping it with pills, or constantly pretending you're thrilled about it.

Nate said...

My wife and I were unofficially engaged for several months before I actually proposed, so it sounds like you are essentially in that stage. But I have to say, you really need to get your act together first. As far as their relationships go, I tend to view other guys through the lens of "what would I think if they were dating one of my sisters?"

My obnoxious tales as an overprotective brother could more than fill this comment space. But even so, if one of my sisters were contemplating marriage to a guy that graduated high school by the skin of is teeth, then ignored the conditions placed on the opportunity he was given for a college education leading to getting kicked out, I would be quite concerned. If I then found out that he couldn't hold down a job, well, I would be trying to break them up or set her up with someone else.

Jake, I think you are a very entertaining writer and I imagine that you would be a lot of fun to hang around with (at least back in my single days). But if you are really getting to the point of being unofficially engaged, you need to get serious about life, respect authority, get disciplined, etc.

Honestly, would you want your possibly hypothetical sister to get engaged to a guy that matched the description you gave in this post?

Now what on earth was Calvin doing making out with a married woman?!

Rissy said...

I don't think I can comment about whether or not you are ready for marriage because I've never met you. However I am EXTREMEMLY concerned about something.... who will take over your role on this blog? If it's Lance I have a feeling you will get some daily haterade comments. Not from me though! : )

Ash said...

Wow... I am so not surprised. Not even a little bit. Sanders seems awesome and the fact that the two of you knew each other from the mish helps a lot.

I'm a little worried though about the whole job/school situation coupled with the new pseudo-engagement. You seem to be the kind of person who has no problem letting others do all the work for you while you just lounge around. Sanders may say she's ok with your work/school ethics now but that could change quickly if you guys do end up marrying. If she's supporting you all the time while you do .. whatever it could cause a lot of BIG issues.

Good luck and be careful.

The Boob Nazi said...

It's a good thing you're going to be a stay at home dad like Lisa wants since you sound like you think you're too good for everything else. Sometimes, you have to shut the hell up and respect someone else. We all do it.

Samantha Kay said...

Lisa is Sanders?
Did you accidently tell her real name?

Ivy said...

WOW! I was not expecting that. No one can tell you who you love.
So many people and their stories. 'They knew each other for two weeks and got married and were happily married forever', same story and they could be 'divorced in a month'.
You make the story 'Jake'... don't be afraid of writing a romantic comedy or thriller... it is in you.
Now go get yourself a job so you can take good care of this girl... and enjoy earning a degree you can fall back on. Married life (even happy ones) is hard so you don't want to complicate it with other worries like financial woes etc.

Do I get to sound all motherly(past that I think) and say I am proud of you? For knowing what you want and admitting your faults? Well I did.
Cheers~Ivy

Autumn said...

Jake. No way! I am so happy for you. Would you mind teaching guys here to do sweet things like this? You're such a sweetheart to Sanders, and I really think that it's amazing. Calvin! Congrats on making out with all those girls, but truly... how do you expect to be loyal when you find someone? Jake has never came off as a player. You on the other hand ALWAYS come off that way. I love you Calvin, but I seriously wish you would find someone as well. Jake, I'm sorry about your job and your schooling. I'd get that straightened out before actually getting married though. AND please stay worthy to go to the temple. Do not sleep with her beforehand. I beg you. I love you is always the hardest 3 words to say, as it should be. :] If you love her, you'll know it. Pray about it Jake. I have all the respect in the world for you right now. Congrats!

alyssa said...

what a lovely & exciting story : ) in my experience (and i certainly do have some experience) the real test of whether it's love is time. don't rush into a marriage.. it's exciting to believe you've found the one, i know. if it's meant to be, you can afford to give yourselves time to discover how real it is before you commit for eternity.

Alexis! said...

I'm nervous for you. If you can't respect authority, you're going to have a hell of a time respecting a wife, ha. Jokes aside though, a man should get his finances, personal desires dealing with anything else deemed importan, and place in the world in order before getting married.

Declarations of a Drama Diva said...

Well... all I have to say is I hope your not getting married because you THINK that is what you are "suppose to do".

Be sure it's what you want and you really love her. Just think if you aren't certain... that's your answer.

Also, what is up with every one thinking they have to get married so early in life????

I'm LDS but still... you have all your life plus eternity... what's the rush. Why don't people date for a longer period of time?

Just asking....

Andee said...

Wow.
I gotta tell you.
I was NOT expecting MARRYING her to be on the list.

Tiffy J. said...

Autumn...what about the post where Jake was texting with like 4 girls at the same time? Just saying, he comes off as a player too sometimes.
and I agree. Get your life together for Sander's sake. She deserves that. because what are you going to do if something happens so you need to support her?

Heather said...

Dude. You are SO engaged. It's awesome. All the haters can just eff off. Getting married early in life is nothing to be ashamed of when you know it's right; I was 19 and wouldn't be the person I am today without my husband.

Katie said...

First of all, Jake doesn't need everyone's advice on when to get married. He and Sanders are spiritual people, who will pray about it and put a lot of thought into it. Secondly, they've known each other for a long time, in a lot of different settings.

Putting off marriage until every detail of a person's life is in order isn't smart, because it almost always leads to morality problems. Plus, life is rarely completely in order. If it's right, it's right, and things will work out.

Congrats Jake!

kelzone said...

good thing sanders is the money maker cause your lazy butt sure won't make any money to raise children...

LOL said...

Maybe you can buy her a ring pop or a CTR ring for the engagement. It should be in your price range. At least then she will know what to expect for the future. j/k :)

Anonymous said...

katie getting married just to have sex is not a reason to rush into getting married either. I say jake should get your crap together. it's a good thing you found someone who will put up with this kind of thing and even wants to marry you wow...i sure wouldn't. there is nothing more unattractive then someone who is unemployed and uneducated! And for all you girls saying it's okay to get married under these kind of circumstances must not be living in reality. Would you all want to start a marriage off like that? I would sure hope not. I feel like some girls just want to get married and don't really think of after the wedding. You are going to be with this person way beyond the wedding...if he doesn't have things figured out now why would he figure it out later.This sanders girl almost seems to good for him, sure it seems like jake has personality but is that enough? i will be horribly frightened if they actually do get married.

Anonymous said...

You never did say how you got kicked out of college. Did you get kicked out 'cause you waste all your time writing this blog instead of doing homework?

Just sayin'

Anonymous said...

you are a stupid idiot!

being married is hard enough for so many reasons, but add to that the fact that you can't keep a job or stay in school and you are asking for trouble.

Amy said...

Wait, so isn't this the girl who has a business in South America and you would be the Mr Mom? If this is still the case, you don't need school or a job, just some bermuda shorts! HA! But really I agree with the previous comments. Happiness is key. Each other's happiness. So I hope you make the decisions that will bring you the utmost joy! So excited to see where this goes. :)

Little Miss Paige said...

No, you're not going to U of U anymore? That stinks, because I am going there. Thanks for crushing my run-in with MBP. Not that I would try to do that or anything. Just sayin'.

I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!!

XOX

Ryan Hadlock said...

Jake, take a loooooooooooong time with this pseudo-enagement, engagement, whatever you want to call it. There is NO question you're not ready - read your own post and take off any rose-colored glasses you might be wearing. Marriage can be great (I hear :-D ) but you have tons of time to worry about that. Figure out what you want to do with your life, Make SURE you and Sanders talk about every aspect of how you want your future to be, and then get married. Don't listen to a single person that tells you to get married fast so you avoid morality problems, that is beyond retarded and NO reason to get married. Just be good and focus on the important stuff - sex will still be there when you actually get married. Good Luck dude!!! :-)

Whitney said...

That totally sucks about those two things, but the third one it pretty big. Okay, sanders has some balls... props to her! haha, and I of course mean that in a nice way! have you ever thought about being an author? caussseeee that was an awesome story haha

Brynn said...

Good Luck Jake!

The only thing that sort of concerns me is the fact that you compare Lisa to Andrea. It seems that Andrea is 'The Standard' and you really didn't date her long enough to find out all of her weaknesses and annoying qualities, so of course she is going to be a hard person to out-do.

The only reason why I bring this up is because, now it may not seem like an issue but there may come a particularly hard day (because marriage is not easy) when you start to question if Andrea would have been a better fit.

If you do decide to marry Lisa, you need to make a conscious decision that she is the ONE for you and stick with it because it's easy to get into that 'grass is greener' mentality. I've seen this happen, personally, in some of my friends' marriages. Sad.

Just something to think about.

Anonymous said...

I would like to know how you feel about the Anonymous haters you have on this blog. I think it is absolutely hilarious. I love how you keep doing what you doing, even with all the hating.

So funny. I could care less if this blog was real or fake, because it is damn funny.

Please keep making us laugh.

samnhal said...

Get married man, well, first maybe do that whole fasting and praying bit, but congratulations man! That's totally what it's like when you're in love and find the right one. At least for me anyway....also, I don't remember it snowing in Bountiful on New Years Eve. Maybe it did up the hill.

Also, who needs school and work when you're going to be moving to Costa Rica with your wifey?

M-Cat said...

1. You're all a bunch of man-sluts and I friggin love that about you.

2. The anon haters who post make me laugh with their self righteousness, yet are afraid to leave their real names. No gonads.,

3. Go ahead and get married. You can live on love and lettuce right?

Amy said...

Recipe for Honeymoon Salad:
Lettuce Alone!!

;o)

nikki said...

i seriously thought there would be a lot more comments than this on this post.

pseudo-congrats on the pseudo-engagement.

i was gonna write a long ole comment with my advice and crap. but, you got a lot of that already coming your way it seems. so ill just say - good luck!

Chelsea H said...

I'm happy that you've found someone but ummm hello as cute as it is that you had the whole marriage conversation, you need to do a completely awesome, legit proposal that she can brag to all of her friends about. The end.

Congrats on finding someone you want to spend the rest of your life with! So do it right and make it official! :)

Bonnie said...

This sounds exactly how my husband and my first "I love you" Came to be, but instead of a love sac, it was a hammock. We didnt kknow how it was going to happen, but it just did!

Anonymous said...

Keep up the great posts guys, my wife and me get a kick out of them.

I have been married 11 years and been satisfied the entire time. Too many of my friends married wrong. The Church is so uptight about sexual talks before marriage.

If your dream is to have her dress up like super girl and she hates that, well you are in for a problem.(I was trying to keep my example PG here)

As LDS young adults we jump into marriage without even talking about sex with our future spouse.

If you bring it up and she gets weird, my advice is dump her, find someone who has been raised to appreciate a healthy sexual relationship. It will save you much heart ache in the future. I see the heart ache every Sunday in my ward.

Don't let it happen to you. My 2 cents.

"if you study divorces as we have had to do in these past years," said President Kimball, "you will find there are... several reasons. Generally sex is the first. They did not get along sexually." (Kimball, Teachings, 312)

C.J. said...

Getting--and staying--married is a LOT harder than graduating from college, or keeping a job. It's part of our path to Eternal Progression for a reason--it's possibly the hardest job you can ever have.

Before you know whether this girl, or any girl, is the right girl, you need to test your ability to commit--to anything--period.

Anonymous said...

Not gonna lie, You sound like a total loser. That is all...
Actually, you both sound like total losers.